Monday, May 23, 2011

#11 To-Do

Acknowledge the change to your social schedule

As mentioned with amae, a break up most quickly effects your social schedule. You and your girlfriend/ boyfriend probably had a process or schedule of when you talked during the day, how often you texted one another, which meals you ate together, etc. So as soon as the phrase "just be friends" is muttered, there is a fast switch to the schedule.
This can be the most difficult part. Most especially if you have abandoned other friendship opportunities. 

If you recognize that the schedule and constancy will be lacking, then make plans to fill those previously filled times.
For example, if you are used to texting at a certain time, rather than change your schedule, it may be helpful to text a different friend at that time until you get used to not having it. If it was a long distance relationship, maybe you did the web cam every Sunday night. It feels normal and regular to do that every Sunday night, so if you don't it might make you really sad at first. So try to schedule things at the same time as you did with your former. This may help the transition process as you figure out a new schedule. 

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